


John's Birthday

by DaisyFairy



Series: Two Word Prompts [4]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Experiments, Gen, John's Birthday
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-30
Updated: 2016-04-30
Packaged: 2018-06-05 11:03:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6702160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaisyFairy/pseuds/DaisyFairy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What would a consulting detective who loves experiments get for his blogger for his birthday?</p>
            </blockquote>





	John's Birthday

"Oh my God." John says with disgust and disbelief. Sherlock had inviting John to accompany him on a trip to his parent's country house, and having nothing better to do on his birthday he had agreed. However they are now standing in a far corner of the grounds and it looks like a crime scene all ready for the forensics team to move in. Little flags on the ground mark out what looks like six shallow graves, and there is equipment in crates under the trees.

"I know, isn't it amazing. I knew you would like it."

"What gave it away?" John replies sarcastically.

Sherlock completely misses the sarcasm and replies "Well, I didn't know what to get you for your birthday. Then I remembered how you were reading those forensics journals about estimating time of death, so I read the journals and did a few preliminary experiments over the next few months until I came up with a proper experimental method. Then last month when I was here I set this all up."

"How long have you been planning this?" John asks incredulously.

"About 5 months." Sherlock replies, then continues enthusiasticly "So, we have gloves, overalls, face masks and goggles. We have shovels and all of the burial places are marked out. There are plastic sheets to lay the remains on, and plenty of equipment for taking samples and examining the bodies. They have all been in the ground for 1 month, but with different methods of wrapping or covered in different chemicals before burial." Sherlock stops to draw breath and looks around proudly. "My Father has been kind enough to keep a record of the weather for us for the last month so we will know how much moisture they have been exposed to, and the temperatures."

"So you buried, what, dead pigs here?"

Sherlock looks shocked "Don't be an idiot John, how often do we want to know how long ago a pig was buried. I got corpses that had been donated to science from the medical school."

"And buried them in your parents garden." John says woodenly.

"Yes. Isn't it brilliant." Sherlock says wide eyed with excitement.

"So, for my birthday, you got me an afternoon of examining decomposing bodies." John asks carefully.

"Yes, well the samples could keep us busy for weeks really, but yes." Suddenly Sherlock looks concerned and his mouth turns down a little at the corners "You do like it? Don't you?"

"Yes, yes, of course I do." John says quickly, not able to stand disappointing his friend after he has gone to so much trouble. "It's just a lot to take in, I really wasn't expecting anything like this. I, I just thought we were having a meal with your parents."

"Mummy is cooking us a meal for later, after we have "finished playing in the garden" as she put it. Honestly John, she has no understanding of the importance of scientific experimentation."

John can't help a smile tugging at his lips "Do they know what you have buried here?"

"Of course they do. They had to sign the paperwork that Mycroft made me fill out."

"So Mycroft knows?"

"I wasn't going to tell anyone, but Mycroft found out and insisted that paperwork had to be filled in so that my parents wouldn't be arrested for incorrect disposal of human remains, or suspected of being serial killers."

Just then John's phone beeps, as if his name is an invocation Mycroft has texted him.

  
**I trust that you are enjoying yourself Dr Watson. Please let me know if you will be requiring any more cadavers. ;-) MH**

Smug bastard, probably thinks this is hilarious. He actually sent a winking face. Prick.

"That was Mycroft, just asking if I like my present. Um, your parents don't mind then. Dead bodies in the garden."

"No. Why would they? It's not like they use this part of the land. They always let me do my experiments, they just act like they aren't important, like I'm just playing games. It really is infuriating." Sherlock looks perplexed about his parents lack of understanding.

John tries to muffle a sigh and then decides that for Sherlock's sake he will make the best of this. It is after all the most effort anyone has ever put into a birthday gift for him, even if it is disgusting and horrifying. Taking a deep breath he says "OK, where are the overalls then?"

Sherlock starts taking the protective clothing out of one of the crates and hands it to John. He then adds "Of course to really do this properly we would rebury them and come back regularly to check on progress. My parents are always asking me to visit more often, so..."

The hopeful look in Sherlock's eyes hurts John deep inside. He can see the little boy who always wanted a friend to play with, and John is completely unable to deny him. "Can't wait." He replies with as much enthusiasm as he can muster.

Sherlock smiles widely, the smile that lights up his face that John has only ever seen directed at him, and feels himself answering with a grin. If this will make his idiot friend happy so be it. John decides however that next year he is going to drop some very heavy hints about a new watch.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the two word prompt "decomposition afternoon".


End file.
